I know this comes from a purely selfish place, but this is the one place where I can do that… my blog=all about me. Please do not get divorced. I dunno if mom was joking when she told Ivy that she “wanted her in the settlement…” these days, its hard to tell. You guys are perfect for each other. I would be saying that even if you didn’t hatch me. You two have been such pillars of strength for one another and gotten each other (and our family) through some very dark days. Why waiver now? Mom, please start sticking up for yourself. As a strong, take no shit woman, it saddens and confuses me to see you get so upset with dad and not do anything about it. Stop internalizing, dad certainly does not. Its like you two are are on opposite ends of the spectrum when it comes to conflict. You just keep it in and let it continue to smolder and hurt you & dad just goes “ka boom!” and then doesn’t say anything for a week. There has to be some middle ground. Dad, please stop venting all of your frustrations about EVERYTHING to mom. You encounter so much stress stress in your life. I know that ninety percent of it you didn’t ask for. But you got it. Channel some of the anger, lashing out at the one who loves you no matter what is for sure not the answer. Maybe you could try to just accept what is out of your control and let go of it. If you don’t, you will find yourself in St. Luke’s with another heart operation but you will have alienated so many that the recovery process will be a very lonely one.
I love you both individually, and as a unit too much to watch this happen.
p.s. the older a kid is when the parents divorce, the more it fucks up the kid(s)… please don’t make me, my brothers, and my sister crazier than we already are.