RSS Feed

Category Archives: higher learning

when I am 30, no one is going to ask me what my GPA was. I feel ahead of the curve for realizing that.

Dear Boy That Sits in Front of Me in Math Class:

Posted on

There is no question in my abnormally large sized head that at the beginning of the semester, I was convinced that you were the most obnoxious creature that i had ever met in my entire life. The way you made jokes that weren’t funny and were the only one laughing about them drove me a little bonkers. The way that you scowl at the learning disabled kid in the class when he asked what was possibly the three hundredth question he was asking that class period enraged me. I thought you were an idiot and quite a tool to boot.

Now I kind of like you. I scolded you via loud whisper for making fun of the young man who doesn’t get it and you apologized sincerely and have not done it since then. I appreciate that. The rest of the civilized human race does too, I am certain. Also, did you borrow a joke book from the library, some of them are actually funny now!

Way to get with the program, kid!

-Girl who usually has an extra stick of gum that she is willing to share.


Dear Academic Support Center at School:

Posted on

You sorta remind me of a Greyhound bus station. Your lighting is depressing and your walls are an institutional grey. You smell faintly of Fritos and old lady perfume. I think its best if I keep our relationship strictly platonic at best. I much prefer a quiet corner in the library or in the lobby by one of the entrances, or the baby cafe inside the larger cafeteria downstairs. While I appreciate the “support” that you give to many, I will politely decline for now.